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THANK YOU




The Consultant Specialist in my hospital once apologize to me for saying a not-so-good words towards me.

"Maaf ya dik, saya tidak sepatutnya ngomong (bercakap) begitu. Saya lagi pusing tadi, banyak urusan. Bila saat-saat begitu perangai buruk akan keluar. Saya minta maaf ya"

I was like.. surprise at the moment he said that, and actually MORE surprised of what he said before. But i don't take it in my heart although if he actually does meant it, it doesn't matter. I already know it .haha.

Actually, there's a time in life, we'll be the 'bad' man. Although we want it or not, at least, once in a while we used to be lost from who we used to be. At the time, we are not our own self, and nobody seems to know us at the time. There are time when everything seem to be unbearable and we can't afford to do anything and nobody seem to understand what we're going through. And its the time where i really miss you the most:)

MISSING YOU

I am not a very good speaker, or actually, whenever i feel bad or grrrr, its very difficult for me to deliver what's in my heart. So, the best things i can do is being annoying. By being annoying means, i will tend to hurt others by using inappropriate words,and of course it might had hurt them. I may not mean to, but i used to do that to divert my disappointment. Or else, i will remain still, not talk nor laughing, because i am afraid i may hurt them again with my bombastic sarcastic words. So i stop. But my silence always being an issue. My mum, for an example, always complained of my silence. My siblings will tend to punish me every time i used to say the harsh words. My friends used to show their discomfort and disappointment towards my attitude.Everybody seems unable to accept the bad side of me. But not you, you always understand me, stick to me during my difficult times. Endure my anger, entertain me, and never give up to put the smile in my face.

I don't think that i treat you differ from others, but you always treat me well. Every time i'm in anger, i will say everything i had in my head and you will listen to them patiently. Every time i went silent, you will take what ever it is to make me talk again. I never ask you to understand me, but you seem to know me very well. You never judge me, always appreciate me despite all my weakness . The best things is you never leave me every time i am not myself. You know almost all my weakness but never ever talking back about me, and always make me feel refresh. Always supporting me and love me. I am flattered. You always be the one and the ONLY ONE who can handle me. I really appreciate that.

THANK YOU
Because of you, i can take a break. Sometimes, i am so tired of this world. So tired of myself. So tired to be the one i am supposed to be. Tired of everything..

THANK YOU
Because of you, i can rest my heart well, i can take a deep breath, closed my eyes and try to cover up everything

THANK YOU
For being there for me at my good and bad self. Accept me whatever i am. Hold me during my difficulties. Never abandon me. and always encourage me.

I will always remember your kindness, and will try to be like you, to others who ever need me in their bad time. So, for you, consultant specialist, i forgive you.haha.

p/s:
my message: Hi you, i think i'm very annoying today.Thanks k for always be there and endure the annoying me back then. Haha, really miss you.
her message:: no la, you're the coolest and the most awesome person i ever know.

;)
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